Asking for Five is Relative…

I am overcome with a distinct lack of creativity this evening, coupled with a waxing and waning current of melancholia.

I was going to post another edition of Vinyl Beauties, but I just can’t be arsed.

So, in light of my self indulgent fancy, I’m posting the “5 Things” meme, that Max prompted the other day.

Here goes:

What were you doing 10 years ago?

Drinking, dancing and babysitting working with hanging around with a string of smelly rock stars and dodgy media types.

What were you doing 1 year ago?

Preparing to move house and thinking about divorce. Other than that, pretty much what I’m doing now.

Five Songs That You Know All The Lyrics To.

Only five? There must be thousands. I’ll take a slightly different tack on this one and post the actual songs. Five out of my canon of favourites:

(I don’t expect you to watch any of these, but you might be pleasantly suprised if you do… )

1. Datarock – Computer Camp Love

Thanks to modobs for posting the video (which I hadn’t seen until now) on her blog and putting this song forefront in my feeble mind today. I still think the song works better without the visual, but maybe that’s just me…

Those crazy Norweigans. Scandinavian’s are nuts, I tell you. I mean that in the nicest possible way…

2. David Bowie – Queen Bitch

An old favourite. Love the boots, or die. The show this video is lifted from, was recorded in the year I was born and not seen or released for public consumption until a couple of years ago. It’s never too late. Such a great song. It’s not hard to see how coked Bowie is at the end…

3. The Bureau – Only For Sheep

I just love this song. An early ’80’s lost classic.

4. Turin Brakes – Pain Killer (Summer Rain)

The first song I ever heard from my favourite band of all time. These boys saved my life and they know it. Lucky me. Maybe I’ll tell you about it some time. I can not tell you how much I love Turin Brakes…. and this song make me fuzzy long time.

Isn’t Olly a honey?

5. Rolf Harris – The Court of King Caractacus

I know there are other people out there who can sing this song from start to end, but I’m the only person I know who can. Everybody loves Rolf. Why else would anyone take the time to make a video like this? And yes, that is Rolf…(who is originally from Perth)

Five Things You Would Do If You Were a Millionaire.

1. Use my wealth and might to inform not only the wider public, but also the mostly clueless medical fraternity of the dangers of psychotropic medication, by launching the mother of all lawsuits against the every pharmaceutical company responsible for the manufacture and marketing of such dangerous, brain altering chemicals. It wouldn’t give me back the last five years of my life, but it might save some others.

2. TRAVEL. Who wouldn’t? I would base myself in London, retread Europe and skip across the Atlantic to take a leisurely stroll around the US to get smashed with my online friends. Morocco also looks nice.

3. Buy a lifetime supply of incandescent light globes.

4. Buy a fucking house. The median house price in Perth has risen to $500,000 in the last year. Why do I live here again? It’s only the most isolated capital city on the planet. How is that attractive?

5. Sponsor a gazillion children in third world countries. And cats.

Five Bad Habits

1. Smoking when I drink. [takes a satisfying drag on her Dunhill Blue]

2. Reading paragraphs backwards in the vain belief that I might actually understand what I’m reading.

3. Procrastinating. I’ll elaborate on that later.

4. Self destruction. Make of that what you will.

5. Drunk commenting… or blogging. Ahem.

Five Things You Like To Do
(Choose your own order of preference.)

1. Fall asleep with a purring pussycat curled around my head on my pillow, with his chin on my temple and paw on my cheek. Zzzzzzz…..

2. Absorb information. Whether I can remember it later or not, is another matter.

3. Listen to music I’ve never heard before and find something new to love.

4. Swim naked.

5. Think about sex.

Five Things You Would Never Wear Again.

(I try to never say never, but if you insist…)

1. Flouro. Anything.

2. A g-string. That’s a “thong” for you American speaking people. “Thongs” to Aussies are what you may call “flip-flops”. Confused yet? The sensation of a permanent wedgie does nothing for me.

3. Clip-on earrings. They are of the devil.

4. Anything clothing or accessory-wise, that was fashionable in the ’80’s.

5. An earring in the cartilage of my ear. I am haunted by memories of such pain that even the slightest touch would make me scream. To this day, I thank Simon for getting me drunk with the sole purpose of ripping that evil barbarity out of my delicate little shell.

Five Favorite Toys

Well, some…

Firstly, we have Bungo. Bungo is a Womble, for the unitiated. He sits next to my monitor for a good reason. We understand each other…

Sorely neglected, but always in sight…

It cuts the cheese.

I have a thing for fibre optic lamps. I have two.

The lamp I bought at an antique shop a couple of years ago. The wall hanging, I found lining the bottom of a camphorwood chest in my father’s flat, after he died. My grandfather brought it back from Egypt in World War II. It was in perfect condition, thanks to its lengthy seclusion. I love it.

I could go on a bit more about toys, but that would be telling…

If you read this, consider yourself tagged. Unless you can’t be arsed. I’m completely in touch with that.  I’m going to go and hit myself in the head wth a blunt instrument.

 

Song Of The Day – Iggy Pop – (I’m) Bored