Hooray for Holidays!

I’ve been a little bit busy lately.

Busy planning a holiday.

Where, you ask?

This might give you a hint:

I’m going to New Zealand! Woohoo!

You know, Lord of the Rings country, and all that…

All expenses paid, no less. My mother has just emerged from a 3 year relationship and one of her funny little “end-of-the relationship” quirks, is that she likes to go on holiday…. and I reap all the benefits! Muahahaha!

The flights are free, thanks to the QANTAS Frequent Flyer programme, and all my accomodation and car hire is paid for. For 9 days. Not bad, huh?

We’re doing a self-drive trip around the South Island, which is mostly Alpine landscape and made up of lovely things like this:

Fox Glacier

The only downside (possibly apart from spending 9 days in planes and cars with my mother, which is fraught with potential disaster in itself), is that we have to catch no less than SEVEN connecting flights in total, there and back. Crikey Moses.

I think it will be worth it.

All the planning and itinerary is up to me, as I’m quite good at that kind of thing, so I’ve been scouring the intertubes and holiday brochures for ideas. I think I’ve got it sorted. I’m talking scenic flights, sailing down the fjord (otherwise known as Milford Sound) and getting up close and personal with glaciers. Not to mention the jetboats…

Less the flying time, we’ll have 6 nights to cover the South Island. I think we can just about do it.

Being a bit of a photography nut, I’m so excited about the potential for lovely images, I can’t even tell you.

So, there will be a lot of this:

And possibly not so much of this:

Or, this…

Meaning, obviously, that I won’t be flinging myself across ravines. Although if anyone is kind enough to provide me with a lovely photo opporunity, I’ll be ever so grateful.

We’re flying out on October 16. I can’t wait.

Get ready for copious numbers of highly self indulgent, yet beautiful photographs.

In the words of the immortal Big Kev, “I’m excited!!”

********************************

Finally, as per usual, here is a list of my successful and glorious music downloads in the past couple of weeks. Yay! :

Siouxsie and the Banshees – Venus in Furs
Siouxsie and the Banshees – Peek-A-Boo
Siouxsie and the Banshees – Spellbound
Siouxsie and the Banshees – Arabian Nights
Siouxsie and the Banshees – Christine
Siouxsie and the Banshees – Dear Prudence
Siouxsie and the Banshees – Cities in Dust
The Streets – Let’s Push Things Forward
Junior Marvin & Lee Scratch Perry – Police and Thieves
Willy Mason – Oxygen
Townes Van Zandt – Dead Flowers
Antony and the Johnsons – The Atrocities
Antony and the Johnsons – Man is the Baby
Graham Coxon – Standing On My Own Again
Graham Coxon – You & I
Paul Weller & Graham Coxon – This Old Town
Amanda Ghost – Bad Girl
Amanda Ghost – Idol
Sufjan Stevens – The Seer’s Tower
Sufjan Stevens – The Dress Looks Nice On You
Sufjan Stevens – To Be Alone with You
Sufjan Stevens – Super WomanSufjan Stevens – Size Too Small
Sufjan Stevens – Jacksonville
Sufjan Stevens – John Wayne Gacy Jr
Sufjan Stevens – For the Widows in Paradise
Sufjan Stevens – The World’s Columbian Exposition Part II
Sufjan Stevens – Chicago
Sufjan Stevens – Casimir Pulaski Day
Sufjan Stevens – A Good Man is Hard to Find
Stereolab – Ping Pong
Jackson Browne – You Love the Thunder
Joseph Arthur – Honey and the Moon
Syd Barrett – Baby Lemonade
Tim Buckley – Once I Was
Tim Buckley – Dolphins
Art Brut – Emily Kane
Art Brut – Moving to LA
Art Brut – Formed A Band
The Breeders – Safari
Mogwai – Stanley Kubrick
The (English) Beat – Mirror in the Bathroom
Battles – Atlas
The Go-Betweens – Lee Remick
The Klaxons – It’s Not Over Yet
My Bloody Valentine – Off Your Face
Silversun Pickups – Lazy Eye
The Church – Reptile
The Cult – American Horse
The Libertines – Time For Heroes
Bob Marley – Hammer
Sia – Breathe Me
Mazzy Star – Blue Light
Alice In Chains – Man in the Box
Black Flag – Rise Above
Nine Inch Nails – Wish
Rammstein – Das Modell
Smashing Pumpkins – Tarantula
The Good, The Bad & The Queen – Kingdom of Doom
Chemical Brothers (ft. Ali Love) – Do It Again
Chemical Brothers – Let Forever Be
Butthole Surfers – Who Was In My Room Last Night?
Butthole Surfers – Avalanche
Butthole Surfers – Whatever
Butthole Surfers – Hurdy Gurdy Man
Butthole Surfers – Pepper
Dappled Cities Fly – Make You Happy
Dappled Cities Fly – Cream
Dappled Cities Fly – Fire Fire Fire
Dappled Cities Fly – Vision Bell
Neil Young – Dead Man
Sigur Ros – Svefn-g-Englar
Emilie Simon – Dame de Lotus
The Avalanches – Frontier Psychiatrist
The Avalanches – Since I Left You
Faker – Hurricane
Black Sabbath – Spiral Architect
Queens of the Stoneage – Sick, Sick, Sick

Ok, happy end.

Song of the Day – E.L.O – The Diary of Horace Wimp

Yacht Rock #9

Well, we’re nearly at the end, folks.

If you’ve found this blog through a search engine query for Yacht Rock, welcome!

You’ve come to the right place…

God knows, Jules and I are beyond happy to know that there are other people on the planet who appeciate smooth cheese…

So, here we have Episode 9 of Yacht Rock – “Runnin’ With The Devil”

 

In Episode 9:

Does Drew Carey have a heart? Could Van Halen be the connection between smooth music and the future?

Who will win the battle? The Heavy Metal Devil? Or, Smooth Jesus?

Skiddly diddly bop!

 

See for yourselves:

 

Coming soon: In the next and final episode, who will win the fight to keep smooth music alive? Steely Dan, or the Eagles?

Stay tuned….

 

Yacht Rock 1 – “What A Fool Believes”
Yacht Rock 2 – “Keep The Fire”
Yacht Rock 3 – “I’m Alright”
Yacht Rock 4 – “Rosanna”
Yacht Rock 5 – “I Believe In It” & Yacht Rock 6 – “The Seed Drill”
Yacht Rock 7 – “I Keep Forgettin’”
Yacht Rock 8 – “Gino (The Manager)”

 

Yacht Rock Online

 

 

Song Of The Day – Sufjan Stevens – Chicago

 

 

Search Me. I Dare You…

Something I have noted with keen interest, since I started this blog, is the growth in number and evolution (for want of a better word) of search engine terms people have typed, to end up on my blog.

For some time, they were fairly run of the mill. Of course, once I started bringing sex into the equation, no matter how benign the reference, things began to get interesting.

For a while I was seeing copious results for “huge tits”. There must have been a couple of hundred at least, over the space of about two months.

There was a point when I realised “huge tits” was being replaced by “sweaty breasts”. Huge tits I could understand, but sweaty breasts? No idea…

It seems that “sweaty breasts”, has now, for all intents and purposes, been replaced by “bruised tits”.

Although I know how (see comments), they got here by searching for that term , I’m somewhat disturbed by the volume of enquiries and the violent implications of such a fetish. I don’t like it. It hurts to think about it – especially at this time of the month. Anytime.

Speaking of disturbing things, the under age enquiries of a sexual nature are so far from welcome……………………..

If you’re here for anything like that and you’re still reading, piss the fuck off right now. Instant Karma’s gonna get you……

Then, there is the interesting evolvement of the bondage/fetish queries. I get a lot of those. A LOT. The thing about the bondage queries is that they started off quite innocuous, as far as bondage queries go, but there has been a recent shift.

Allow me to illustrate with a few choice examples:

brown showers – If it wasn’t for Stiletto mentioning it in my comments, I’d have no idea this was so common…

bondage shitting

bondage india

muslim bondage

british bondage – obviously we’re culturally specific with our bondage fetishes…

wedding bondage

cast bondage

fetish colonoscopy – I didn’t expect to see this one. I’ve had more colonoscopys than I care to remember, and I’ve never, ever found it a pleasurable experience…

bondage cake – please explain?

furry in bondage

hot women taking a shit – ok…..

sink plug gag bondage

apple bondage – leave the apples alone! Poor apples…

face alfoil

puke bondage – oh, now please. You might want to see someone about that.

milking machine bondage

ice bondage female

grandpa bondage – go grandpa! hunh….

mummy bondage – are we talking mummys as in egypt, or is this yet another Oedipal complex?

********************

There are variations on all of these, but it’s becoming more and more puzzling, because I’m not quite sure how most of them end up here. I really don’t talk all that much about sex. Or, do I?

Naturally, I’ve just made it 10 times worse by posting all these again. Isn’t it fun?

We shall see.

Feel free to post some of your own search oddities.

I’m curious.

What’s a blog of mine without pictorial diversion? Here’s one for the coffee lovers….

Yeah, I hate coffee…

 

 

Song Of The Day – Blondie – Pretty Baby

Yacht Rock #8

It’s been a while…

My apologies for the break, even though it’s pretty much only Jules and I who really understand the power of smooth music.

See? You didn’t get that either, did you?

Nevermind. There are others who love the taste of cheese. Extra sharp vintage cheddar. That’s what I’m talkin’ about.

It is time for Yacht Rock Episode 8 – Gino (The Manager)

Flashbacks can be so gloriously telling.

It started with a vision… I will say no more…

Yacht Rock 1 – “What A Fool Believes”
Yacht Rock 2 – “Keep The Fire”
Yacht Rock 3 – “I’m Alright”
Yacht Rock 4 – “Rosanna”
Yacht Rock 5 – “I Believe In It” & Yacht Rock 6 – “The Seed Drill”
Yacht Rock 7 – “I Keep Forgettin’”

 

Yacht Rock Online

Coming in Episode Nine – Could this be the end of smooth music as we know it? I really mean it this time…

 

 

Song Of The Day – David Bowie – D.J.

Yacht Rock 5 & 6 (bumper edition)

Yah, it’s been a while….

I’ve no excuse for slacking off with my postings of Yacht Rock, but I’m quite sure than no one but Jules will have noticed. Mind you, I do get a lot of search engine traffic for it, so it’s on with the show….

Let’s see. Where are we up to?

Ah, yes. Episode 5 – “I Believe In It”.

I’m quite fond of this one…

In this episode, these questions and more, may or may not be answered:

1. Who really put the smooth in Michael Jackson? It appears a spear gun plays some part…
2. How could Michael Jackson possibly be a catalyst for Kenny Loggins and Michael McDonald to kiss and make up?
3. Who knew that Vincent Price had supernatural powers? And here I was, thinking he was just an actor…

Go! Go! Toto go!

Bye bye Koko! [waves]

And as a special bonus, here is Episode 6 – “The Seed Drill”.

I’m not only posting this to make up time, but also because it’s an odd episode and I’m not sure it would stand too well on its own…

It’s a history lesson with a difference.

And the lesson is Jethro Tull. The real Jethro Tull. Watch and you’ll see…

Hint: You will appreciate it a whole lot more if you’ve watched Episode One.

Is it wrong that I can name every Jethro Tull song included on the soundtrack? I feel like such a tragic…

Yacht Rock 1 – “What A Fool Believes”
Yacht Rock 2 – “Keep The Fire”
Yacht Rock 3 – “I’m Alright”
Yacht Rock 4 – “Rosanna”

Yacht Rock Online

 

Coming in Episode Seven: Dr Dre saves Michael McDonald? Can it be true? (Michael sure does need a lot of saving…)

 

Song Of The Day – Jethro Tull – Songs FromThe Wood

Lunch With A Lama

I had lunch with the Dalai Lama today.

Well, me and around 500 other people, but who’s quibbling?

His Holiness was in Perth today, passing on his words of wisdom to thousands of followers. There were two free events and a Buisness Leader’s Luncheon. I was at the Luncheon, corporate high-flyer that I am (not).

Tickets were $750 per head.

[pause]

I did not pay $750 for my ticket. My mother is a fan, and she wanted someone to go with. Who was I to say no?

So, as is the wont of my irrepressible, rebellious spirit, I descended upon the venue, loaded with contraband. Ok, not exactly loaded, but “No Cameras Allowed” was not going to stop me trying to get a snap or two. What would be the point of going to such an event if I couldn’t post a photo blog? Hah! I also smuggled in my latest gadget (I’m a bit of a gadget fiend), my Digital Voice Recorder. I’m not sure if that was on the banned-items list or not; I didn’t stop to check…

We were seated at a table (at the back of the room, bugger it), with eight strangers. It was a bit like being on the single’s table at a wedding. Slightly awkward, with some stilted conversation and everyone checking everyone else out. Speaking of checking people out, I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many handsome men in suits all in the one place. Humm…

Oh, what were we there for? Ah, yes. Spiritual matters. Right. Moving right along…

There was grass on our table. It wasn’t even in a container. I wanted to eat it.

I couldn’t resist posting a picture of my new toy, and yes I did record his entire message. Oh, and the placemat. I dug the placemat. The whole event was organised by the Australia-Israel Chamber of Commerce. I’m stilll looking for the connection…

Eating chicken off the Dalai Lama’s face. Brilliant. I thought it was interesting that there was no sign of vegetarian cuisine on the menu. There was only one main course to choose from, and that was chicken. It was pretty good, except half of the room didn’t get to finish their meals because His Holiness arrived on the premises and from that moment it was knives and forks down. If that money hadn’t been going to a good cause, I’d have been pretty cheesed off…

The Lama (I can’t help calling him that…) sat, and talked. And talked. And talked. For over 80 minutes without a break. I feel like I should be ashamed to tell you I fell asleep, but I did nod off. More than once. That was in between looking at his face on the giant screens and feeling an almost uncontrollable urge to run up to one of them and draw a huge pair of pointy ears on him. The man could actually be Yoda. I kid you not.

Do I sound awfully disrespectful? Probably, but it’s not intentional. I have an enormous respect for the man. I am quite in awe of his life story. He is a wonderful ambassador for peace and has inspired millions to lead a more spiritual life. I just found what he was saying to be so very familiar and extremely simplistic. None of it was anything that Jesus didn’t say in the Gospels, but I had to remind myself that he was preaching to a spiritually challenged audience to which these concepts of “kindness”, “compassion” and “forgiveness” meant something different… I thought it was very interesting that in the “question and answer” session after his talk, a man stood up and asked how to ingraine these qualities in himself, because he understood the concepts, but was finding it difficult to keep up the momentum, so to speak. The Dalai Lama didn’t really have a coherent answer.

It’s at this point that I should shut up, because I don’t want to turn this into an “anti” or “pro” any religion rant and I don’t want to offend anyone. It’s also possible it’s too late for that, heh. I’m not anti-Buddhism in any way, I just found his speech, loaded with platitudes and lacking in substance. [shrug]. Although, I do think it’s great that these “Business Leaders” were being addressed, because if anyone needs that kind of message, no matter how simplistic, it is people in charge of other people…

Next! More photos….

There were thankyou’s and blessings and people were getting teary on stage…

Stupid slow shutter speed…

This is His Holiness on his way out, on his way to his next engagement. The hush in the room as he left was such that you could have heard a pin drop. After I took this photo, he passed so close to my table, I could have reached out and touched him. Sweet little Yoda man.

Then it was time for dessert. Yay for chocolate palm trees and pineapple pudding!

Despite any misgivings I’ve given voice to, it was a once in a lifetime opportunity and I’m hugely thankful it came my way. Namaste.

Song Of The Day – Queens Of The Stoneage – Go With The Flow

Vibrator = Hysterically, No Hysteria…

 

I’ve had an awful week. It did get better and yes, I am going to talk about sex toys, but first I’m going to have a little whinge. So, nerr.

It was so very awful at the beginning of the week that the pose I adopted for the whole of Monday was somewhat reminiscent of Cameron in “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off”, after he crashes the Ferarri; lying prone on the couch under a blanket with my eyes closed.

What was wrong? Oh, nothing I’d want to bore you with. Things were either going wrong, had gone wrong or were (in my mind) about to go wrong. You know how it is.

Interpersonal strife does my head in.

I also thought my cat had cancer. On Sunday night I discovered a huge lump that appeared to be growing out of his ribcage. I was (internally) quite beside myself. I love my cat. On Monday I took him to the vet:

“Who do we have here?”

“This is Bilbo”

“Hello Bilbo. My, aren’t you a big boy? What seems to be wrong with Bilbo?”

“He has a big lump on his chest. It’s really big. It’s internal, not on his skin”

“Ok, let’s have a look, shall we? Where is it exactly?”

[points]

“Here.”

“That’s his sternum.”

“Oh.”

[barely concealed smirk from the vet type person]

“I can still take an x-ray if you like.”

“Um, no thanks. I’ll be going now…”

So, there we have the latest addition to Vanessa’s Omnibus of Embarrassing Moments. I mean, I might as well have gone to the doctor and said “I’ve got a lump growing out of my foot”, to be told, “That’s your toe.”

Well, on the bright side, my cat doesn’t have cancer. Big huggles to Firm, who has not been so fortunate this week…

Today, I feel pretty good. Everything is sorted and working well. Nobody is pissed off with anybody anymore and all is well in the world. Amazing how things can turn around.

So, as is my wont, I celebrated with a bit of retail therapy.

And what did I buy?

Vibrators.

Plural.

I thought it was time I updated my collection. One of my old favourites (a bullet for those playing at home – mine was the blue one) died recently and it was definitely time to find a replacement. I didn’t want to buy another bullet, because I had, at times, found it a little difficult to keep hold of, as many women who have owned one may understand. Something with a bit more of a handle was in order.

I usually buy such implements in person at a chain of adult stores here in the city. They are staffed by women and everytime I shop there, I end up having a blast with the girl behind the counter. Vibrators, boxes and batteries strewn everywhere, because they don’t at all mind removing items from their packaging and handing them to you for a test run. Hah! I’m not kidding, although the testing tends to be more on the fingers and tip of the nose than anywhere else. I also think it’s quite fun to observe the men skulking around the dvd section, obviously quite intimidated by two women talking quite openly about their preferences in regards to the inclusion of pearls in a vibrator, or which stimulator provides more bang for your buck…

This time, for something different, I decided to surf the range of Australian adult stores online. It took me an entire evening and I almost gave up at one point because the range was so enormous I just about ran out of steam, until I noticed at one particular site that there were…. free gifts! Woohoo! I ended up buying not one, but three vibrators… and the free gift makes four. Go me!

I guess the free gift kind of makes up for the fact that my package didn’t arrive today. Which means that I have to wait until after the weekend. Which kinda sucks because I was going to take an abstract photo of my purchases to show you. So much for Overnight Express. Oh, well. Use your imagination.

So, whilst we’re on the subject, I thought I’d give a quick dissertation on the history of the vibrator. I’m sure most of you know that they’ve been around for a very, very long time and were orignally used to treat what was known as “Hysteria” in women. That is, sexual arousal and PMS (often go hand in hand – at least they do for me).

I saw a great little Australian doco on SBS a couple of weeks ago called Turn Me On: The History Of The Vibrator. You can watch it for yourself by clicking on the link – it’s only 17 minutes long, (I’m really taken with the music they used for the soundtrack, heh), but if you can’t be bothered watching it, I’ll relay a few interesting facts I gleaned from this short, yet very informative documentary.

• The Hysterical Paroxysm – better known now as the orgasm, was the temporary cure, or preferred outcome of the disease called Hysteria, which was caused by sexual deprivation in passionate women. Nun’s seemed to suffer from it a lot… And they talk about blue balls! In 200AD, it was recommended by the ancient Greek physcian Galen that massaging the genitals be used as a treatment for Hysteria. This was a strictly medical condition.
• Doctors only, were qualified to “treat” Hysteria until the early 20th century. Women were not to treat themselves, as masturbation was considered evil. Sex was solely considered to be penile penetration of a woman, by a man.
• Vibration was considered very useful to create the “Paroxysm” by the medical profession. Before electricity, doctors used enormous steam powered vibrators, pedal driven models (terribly tiring for the poor fellow), then came the handle powered models, which looked disturbingly like a manual drill.

This is one version that is not so much like a drill…, but still what a chore!

Those poor doctors…

Here is an air compressed model from the late 19th century:

Interesting attachments, no? Already looking vaguely familiar, yet still horribly speculum-like…

• The invent of the electric vibrator was a boon for doctors. They were overjoyed. If a doctor had an electronic vibrator, they could have women in and out of the surgery within about 10 minutes, thereby quadrupling their profit margin. It was a revolving door situation with women you see, because they were never able to be cured, due to the nature of the “disease”…

Here is a 1906 version of an electric vibrator. It’s not the famous Veedee vibrator, which bore a frightening resemblance to a circular sander, but it still has that drill appeal:

A bit bloody scary looking if you ask me…. Anyone up for a good drilling? Or a Paroxysm, perhaps?

• Advertisements for all these apparatus appeared in women’s magazines all over the world. Needlework magazines, journals, you name it. Doctors were treating women for Hysteria up until the 1920’s. It wasn’t until the 1950’s that Hysteria was written out of medical journals as being an official “disease”.

Here is an early battery operated vibrator, circa 1950’s (minus the various attachments). Of course it was marketed to smooth out those pesky facial wrinkles…

• During the documentary, an interesting modern-day observation was added by a middle-aged male gynaecologist: “A woman who has never climaxed is extremely unlikely to climax with anything but a proper vibrator.” Personally, I wouldn’t know, but it seems likely in many cases. I found my way to it in my mid-teens…

Are you vibrated beyond all recognition now? I would be if I were you. If it took you .001% of the time to read it as it took me to put this together, I wouldn’t blame you if you never wanted to lay eyes on another vibrator….. Bloody fiddly blogs.

‘Ave a bonza weekend, my sweet things… and indulge yourself, if you will…

Thanks to Vibrator Museum for the photos…

Oh, and happy first day of winter to my fellow southern hemisphere dwellers…:)

 

Song Of The Day – Frank Zappa – Dynamo Hum

I don’t shop for clothes…

It was my birthday in February.

I know, you most likely missed it.

Don’t worry, there’s always next year….

Every year on my birthday, I am given a sizeable shopping voucher for my favourite shop in Perth, 78 Records.

78’s is brilliant. My cup of tea, entirely. It’s a huge place, for Perth. Two stories full of CD’s, DVD’s, books and all kinds of other paraphenalia, all waay left of centre.

When I was neck-high in the music industry, this was the coolest place to take bands for an instore appearance. I had a fine old time babysitting Weezer for a couple of days, and that equated to 78’s most successful instore appearance to date. 700+ people spilling out the door. It was a crazy day. They played an acoustic set. If I could be bothered uploading photos, I would….

Yay!

(it’s very nice to get gushing, congratulatory notes from head office…)

I become very, very excited at the prospect of going to 78’s and having money to spend…

 

Doesn’t look like much, I know. This is only a corner. I was a bit iffy about getting told off for taking pictures…

 

After shopping, it was time for some lunch…. (who thinks they’ll mind me giving them a plug? heh)

 

…and a beer… or several. Little Creatures make some of the best beers on the planet. They’re based here and I know people in other parts of the world, who are so very knowledgable about beer, and they will agree….

 

And, it’s on to the purchases. [blissful sigh]

 

I couldn’t believe my luck finding this. Love are one of my favourite bands of all time. They were around in the 60’s and are completely and totally underrated. Oh, Arthur Lee, for you are my hero….

 

He died late last year. It was a sad day.

 

Ol’ Hunter is a jolly good writer and I love me some boozy adventures….

 

Hehe. I also have a thing for B Z-grade schlock horror…..

 

Speaking of which….. A Russ Meyer favourite. Nude ladies, crazy psychedelia and murder. What more can you ask for?

 

(Not to be confused with Jacqueline Sussan’s ‘Valley of the Dolls’, parody aside…)

 

Brilliant film. It’s what I imagine life to be like on a submarine in wartime, and is highly regarded in terms of realism. Tommy, care to comment?

 

I haven’t seen this for nearly 20 years. For someone like me, who feels very at home blissing out in a mid-late ’60’s kind of way, it’s essential. Born at the wrong time…

 

I’ve never heard of this film. It’s Australian. It just tickled my fancy so much that I bought it simply by viewing the cover art. I’m thinking, poor man’s ‘Tommy’, minus the music… or maybe with some. It has impressive musical credentials, if you’re Australian. I haven’t watched it yet. It’s probably unwatchable, but I’m a curious cat…..

 

Silverchair are mostly regarded overseas as a teenage grunge band from Oz, made good. That was 15 years ago. They grew up. They started working with Van Dyke Parks (think, good Beach Boys) on their last album, Diorama. Stuff happened. It was good. Very good. Daniel Johns is a fucking genius. He grew up in a way nobody would have expected. I could go on about where that came from, but I’d bore you. What I will say is, there was a lot of physical pain associated with that, and all that goes with it. This is their new album.

 

I was sitting on a balcony. The day looked like this down below :

 

 

… and there was good food to be eaten. So very good…

 

 

 

Then there was more beer…. (and wine)

 

 

 

 

After that, things looked a little wobbly….

 

 

 

 

… but I managed to take a dodgy photo of myself in the lav…

 

 

 

[Photo of self removed due to overwhelming feelings of utter self disgust]

 

 

Ok, that’s it. The ending has changed now since I removed that photo and I have an horrendous hangover.

 

Ow.

 

 

Song Of The Day – Magic Dirt – Pace it

 

PS I’m tired of battling with the spacing on posts. If anyone wants to give me a tutorial, I’m up for it, but other than that…. deal with it. As I know you willl…

 

 

Let’s Disco…. Baby

So, Jules and I were having a conversation on one of my blogs, about cheesy videos on YouTube.

She told me, she’d just been watching a video on ‘How to do ‘The Hustle”.  

Y’know…. the disco dance craze from the ’70’s.

I was then reminded of one of my favourite videos in the vast YouTube cannon. 

Oh, it just thrills me…

I’m not quite sure what that says about me, except that I have an extreme fetish for CHEEEZE.

I’m a bit of a disco queen, myself.  Ever since I picked up a second hand vinyl copy of ‘Let’s Disco!’ and the accompanying instructional book around 15 years ago. 

“Step round, back, and together with the right…”  

I should offer lessons.  Any takers?

Although, I may not be as good as the man with the smooth moves in this video… 

I also don’t recall ever learning that step he does in the last 30 seconds.  I wonder if it has a name?  You have to admit, it’s fairly impressive…. [snicker]

Now, make sure you have your dancing shoes ready.  Those Finnish peeps really know how to get their groove on….

**WARNING:  Do not eat or consume fizzy beverages for the duration of this video.

I’m in love with all the ladies’ shoes…

I’m also intrigued as to how the woman goes through all the instructional part at the beginning, only to jig about doing her own thing when the party really gets going.  What’s all that about?

Those crazy Scandinavians…

 

Coming soon:  EUROVISION!!!  YAY!!!!

 

Song Of The Day – Van McCoy – The Hustle

Drugs, guns and the whole bloody mess

I really, really didn’t want to write a blog about the massacre at Virginia Tech. 

However, I have a couple of bees buzzing around in my wee bonnet that need to get out.  I’m allergic to bees.

I’ll try and keep it brief.  Well, kinda.

I found out today that Cho Seung-hui was on antidepressant medication at the time of the massacre.  

Why does that not surprise me?  

It had already occurred to me that he might be.   In fact, I was just waiting for confirmation.

The reason it doesn’t surprise me, is that I am well aware of the statistics regarding violent and suicidal behaviour under the influence of SSRI’s.  (Selective Seretonin Reuptake Inhibitors).  SSRI’s are the most commonly prescribed type of antidepressant.

The following is a sample of school shooters known to have been taking antidepressants:

• May 21, 1998, Springfield, Oregon: 15-year-old Kip Kinkel murdered his own parents and then proceeded to school where he opened fire on students in the cafeteria, killing two and wounding 22. Kinkel had been on Prozac and had undergone “anger management” classes.
• April 16, 1999: Notus, Idaho: 15-year-old Shawn Cooper fired two shotgun rounds in his school narrowly missing students; he was taking a mix of antidepressants.
• April 20, 1999, Columbine, Colorado: 18-year-old Eric Harris was on the antidepressant Luvox when he and his partner Dylan Klebold killed 12 classmates and a teacher before taking his own life in the bloodiest school massacre in history. The coroner confirmed that the antidepressant was in his system through toxicology reports. Dylan Klebold’s autopsy was never made public.
• May 20, 1999, Conyers, Georgia: 15-year-old T.J. Solomon was being treated with a mix of antidepressants when he opened fire on and wounded six of his classmates.
• March 7, 2000, Williamsport, Pennsylvania: 14-year-old Elizabeth Bush was on the antidepressant Prozac when she blasted away at fellow students wounding one.
• March 22, 2001, El Cajon, California: 18-year-old Jason Hoffman was on two antidepressants, Effexor and Celexa, when he opened fire at his high school, wounding five. Hoffman had also undergone an “anger management” program.

Smells a bit funny, dontcha think?

I have vast personal experience of SSRI’s.  I was on them for five years and they cost me almost everything, including three attempts on my life.  I never would have thought in that entire time I was on them, that it was the prescribed drugs making me ill.   I only stopped taking them because I thought they weren’t working, after my last suicide attempt.  Not for a second did I expect that they were the cause of it all.  

I’m still putting my life and myself back together.  It has been devastating.  I only went to my GP once with a complaint about my arm and I happened to mention I was having a hard time at work and that I was very stressed.  She wrote me a prescription.  Boom.  Hello drugs and hello psych ward!  I had no history of mental illness or depression.  

But enough about me.  I’m just telling you this, to put my passion regarding the subject in context.  I am not in favour of these drugs.  They may work for some, but there is no way to tell what is going to work and how.  There is no way on earth to measure brian chemistry.   It’s all hypothesis and guesswork.  

Would you want people playing with your brain, knowing that they’re just guessing?

If only I had known.  I was so naïve.

There have also been a number of celebrity deaths linked with antidepressants: 

• Phil Hartman’s wife was on them and complaining of adverse side effects just before she shot and killed her husband. There is now a law suit against Pfizer, the makers of Zoloft, claiming it was the cause of her violent rage that induced her to murder her husband, before committing suicide.
• Michael Hutchence was taking antidepressants at the time of his apparent suicide in a hotel room.
• Del Shannon shot and killed himself on Prozac.
• Elliot Smith was on a cocktail of psychiatric drugs, including Avanza when he died from a self inflicted stab wound to the chest.   I mean, who the hell in their right mind does that??

I could go on…

Here are a few  more handy facts:

Dr. John Zajecka reported in the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry that the agitation and irritability experienced by patients withdrawing from one SSRI can cause “aggressiveness and suicidal impulsivity.” In Lancet, the British medical journal, Dr. Miki Bloch reported on patients who became suicidal and homicidal after stopping an antidepressant, with one man having thoughts of harming “his own children.”

Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) can cause anxiety and agitation, bizarre dreams, and akathisia. It is estimated that between 10% and 25% of SSRI users experience akathisia, often in conjunction with suicidal thoughts, hostility and violent behavior.

A 1998 British report revealed that at least 5% of SSRI patients suffered “commonly recognized” side effects that include agitation, anxiety and nervousness. Around 5% of the reported side effects include aggression, hallucinations, malaise and depersonalization.

In 1995, nine Australian psychiatrists reported that patients had slashed themselves or become preoccupied with violence while taking SSRIs. “I didn’t want to die, I just felt like tearing my flesh to pieces,” one patient told the psychiatrists.

5% may not seem like many people at first glance, but when you consider that there are approximately 1 million people on Antidepressants in Australia, that’s 50,000 people suffering adverse effects of these drugs.  That’s a LOT of people, and some are going to be worse than others.   Goodness knows what the figures are for America.

So, do ya think prescribed psychiatric drugs might have played a part in sending Cho Seung-hui off the deep end? 

I reckon so. 

At the very least, it’s worth investigating.

I keep reading about the media furore in the US, with everyone looking for someone to blame.  It’s obvious there are too many factors at play to point the finger at one entity, although I am utterly convinced that this would never have happened if it wasn’t for that young man being on antidepressants.

I see American gun laws as the other major player. 

Being an Australian, I find American gun culture a most curious thing.  It’s just so alien to what I know.  We don’t ‘do’ guns here.  After the Port Arthur massacre in 1996 (which is still the world’s worst.  Something to be proud of, eh?) the Australian government spent $500 million on a gun buy-back scheme.  640,381 personal firearms, including semi-automatic .22 rifles and shotguns, were handed in.  Now, some types of guns are banned altogether and you need a strict licence to own one, which involves background checks and giving a bloody good reason for needing a gun.  Such as being a farmer, law-enforcement officer, or sports shooter.

The only other people who have guns in Australia are the occasional well-off criminal, who can afford to buy one on the black market.

I don’t get the impression Cho Seung-hui was terribly well off.

I do understand that the psychology of gun ownership is far more complex in America.   I mean, just look at the Wild West.  The culture is way too ingrained to ever hope of pushing through legislative changes like Australia did after the Port Arthur massacre. 
 
I don’t want to go on and on about this, but I’ll leave you with some brief statistics:

Gun ownership in Australia is 5.2%. 

Gun ownership in the US is soomewhere between 38-50%.

Here is a comparison of US gun homicides to other industrialized countries:
In 1998 (the most recent year for which this data has been compiled), handguns murdered:

373 people in Germany
151 people in Canada
57 people in Australia
19 people in Japan
54 people in England and Wales, and
11,789 people in the United States

Note that these numbers account only for HOMICIDES, and do not include suicides, which comprise an even greater number of gun deaths, or unintentional shootings.

Even if you put the population of all the other countries together, which would roughly equate to the population of the United States, the death toll doesn’t even come close. Do you suppose it’s because the other countries have gun control laws?

Just, maybe.

Lastly, a disturbingly humorous video to lighten the mood:

Watch as this DEA agent shoots himself in the foot in front of a class of students.   Literally.  My favourite part is when he pulls out the bigger gun.  Oh, and when he says “I am the only one professional enough in the room to carry one.”   That’s a cracker.  I am however slightly disturbed that there are children in the room.  Check it out:

In other news:  Over 200 people killed by suicide bombers this week in Iraq.  Just thought I ought to mention it….

Other Sources: Citizen’s Commission on Human Rights, ICHV.org

Song Of The Day: Pop Will Eat Itself – Wise Up Sucker!

Gimme guitars!

I have a slight fetish for all things retro.  I use the blanket term ‘retro’ because there isn’t one specific era that interests me.  I love design from pretty much every decade of the 20th century, although I would have to say that the 1930’s, ’50’s, ’60’s and ’70’s would top the list.  There is often confusion over the words ‘retro’ and ‘vintage’ – ‘retro’ being inspired by a certain look from the past, and vintage being the real deal.  It doesn’t really matter to me if it’s one or the other.  I just like old things… and things that look old. 

So, imagine my excitement when I happened across the John Hornby Skewes & Co website, where they have a plethora of beautiful, vintage inspired Danelectro guitars. 

I’ve played guitar on and off for years, but I’m not very good because I don’t keep it up.  I’ve been in a couple of bands, although more in a lead singer capacity, due to my dubious guitar playing skills.   Making music is something I enjoy immensely though and seeing these little beauties has just inspired me to tune up and get playin’.

Danelectro may not one of the better known makes of guitars, but I reckon they’re one of the coolest and they have a more than impressive pedigree.  Syd Barrett, Jimmy Page, Eric Clapton, Jimi Hendrix ,Tom Verlaine and Link Wray all played Danelectros, and that’s good enough for me.

Plus, they’re just so damned pretty!  (and so damned expensive)

Anyone feeling generous?  I don’t own an electric guitar, and I’d be more than willing to try one of these as my first…

I can’t make up my mind which colour I like best.  I’m not too hot on the grey, but the others are just too cute.  I love the shape…

Then, if I did play electric guitar, I’d need one of these:

The sweetest mini amp on the planet.  Also comes in ‘daddy-o yellow’.  Dig it!

Oh, and not to forget:

Groovy effects pedals!  There was a gorgeous purple one, but I’ll go with this one because it matches the amp.  Note that I have no idea what effects it actually makes.  I just like the way it looks.  Hah.

*sigh*

Alas, being a little short on funds, I’ll just have to stick with boring Ol’ Faithful for now…

My birthday is nearly a year away.  Plenty of time to save!  *nudge nudge, wink wink*

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m just going to toddle off and salivate over some vintage cameras….

Song Of The Day  – The Beatles – I Me Mine

Inspiration via Retro To Go

Vinyl Beauties – Part 1

I have an enormous collection of vinyl records.  I mean, too bloody big.  Around 900+ albums and God knows how many singles (45’s).  Could be around the same number.  I can’t play any of them because both my turntables are out of order, but I just can’t let go.  I’ve given away a few albums over the years and regretted it.  Still.  So, I lug them around from house to house…

I’ve been collecting records since I was a kid.  Pre-teen.  I was earning my own money from the age of 9, and what did I spend it on?  Yup.  You got it.

I was obsessed with music.  Not much has changed in that regard, except that I’m running out of space.   Records take up a LOT of space.  

I worked for a huge record company for a couple of years and had access to their entire back catalogue.  Holy Jeebus.  I went nuts.  They probably got the bill after I left, heh.   My CD collection is almost as large as my vinyl, or possibly larger.  I’ve never counted.

Part of the reason I hang onto records, is because I love the big covers.  There was nothing quite like lying on your bed, listening to your new purchase and examining the artwork and words in fine detail.  Ahhh… memories.  CD’s just aren’t the same…

Occasionally I still buy vinyl secondhand, if I see a cover I really like.  Covers were and are, that cool…

For some time now, I’ve been collecting pictures of joyous vinyl album covers I’ve come across online.  There are too many to post in one hit, so I’m starting a series:

I hate to say it, but she reminds me of me when I’ve had a few too many to drink.  Well, I don’t generally try to set my face on fire and I only smoke when I’m very sloshed, but she speaks to me.  Hah!  Almost makes you want to hear ‘Bolero’ again, eh?

Doesn’t everybody love Herb?  This album cover has been parodied numerous times, I believe most famously by Soul Asylum. They had the best covers in the 60’s….

Well, isn’t Eddie a lucky guy?  Who would think there would be naked, piano crawling beauties at the Open Face Sandwich Club? 

Someone I know saw this recently and said at first glance, “That’s hot!!”.  Umm.. ok.  Apparently women on the toilet turn him on…  Hey, what ever floats yer boat, I say.  I think Millie Jackson (is she related??)  is just feeling wholly satisfied for being back where the shit is.  By the look on her face, she’s been waiting a long time. 

Well, what can you say except, WHAT THE FUCK??  At least he gives a warning for sensitive eyes, but not before you’ve seen the rest.  Not that I’m offended. I’m just trying to work out what the hell is going on here… Is there a point?

I’m sure someone has an explanation.  If not feasible, at least amusing…

I’ll just leave you with those for now.  Vinyl albums that most likely will never be released on CD and if they were available digitally, what would be the point?

Vinyl rules, ok.

More to come…..

 

Song Of The Day – James Brown – King Heroin

My wardrobe turns me on…

It’s set to be the lastest thing, kids!

Now you can have your lover’s face right where you want it ALL THE TIME!

I suppose it wouldn’t have to be your lover.  It could be YOUR MUM if you were that way inclined.  Ew.  I don’t think I should have gone there…

The thing I have to wonder is how much of a turn on would it be to be greeted with a larger-than-lifesize image of your own lips/eyes/nosehair…. Any takers?

There is something else I must know:

Will somebody please, please tell me what is going on here?

Song of the Day -  X-Ray Spex – Oh Bondage, Up Yours!

You like what??

Hello.  My name is Vanessa, and I am slightly unusual.

Well, maybe a little more than slightly…

I happily sit outside the circle, to the left.  It’s where I’ve always lived.  It’s nice.  They know me here.

I’m not crazy.  I just like different things to ‘most people’.

I like Test Patterns.

See?

I really do.

I even have a favourite Test Pattern.

Check it out:

When I was a kid I would always wake up too early for TV and this is what I saw when I turned on the box.  Can you see why I was fascinated?  A spooky looking little girl who always looked to me like her head was about to begin turning 360’s, and as for that clown thing….  I’m not generally afraid of clowns, I just think they’re stupid.  But that weirdo clown paired with the girl like they’re ACTUALLY PLAYING NOUGHTS AND CROSSES, that creeped me the fuck out, like it’s alive or something.   And, what is with that clown’s body?? 

Useless trivia:   This Test Pattern has a name.  It’s ‘Test Card F’, and it’s a creation of the BBC in the UK.  They’re playing noughts and crosses so the TV cameras could have something to focus on in the centre of the picture.  Hence, the placement of the ‘X’. 

Then there’s this one:

Familiar to viewers of televisual pictures in 30 different countries.  Not seen quite so often these days, due to most TV stations broadcasting 24 hours.   I like the geometric shapes and vague optical illusions.  I like the colours and shades.  It makes me feel warm and fuzzy, like my favourite teddy bear.  No, I’m not kidding.

So, imagine my joy at finding this for sale online:

Orrrrhhh!   Test Pattern Watch!!

I’m tempted…. Oh, so tempted….

Song Of The Day:   Sigur Ros – Glosoli